A good man is hard to find but a hard man is good to find !

12/20/07 04:28 PM

"Why is it so hard to find good single men" a of friend of mine recently asked? Well there are lot's of reasons for that but there are also some really great guys out there if you can drag them out of their caves. Men don't like to expose too much of themselves because we are afraid of rejection and getting hurt. Well, maybe not the macho kind of guys but a lot of other men are really confused about how to act on a date.

In the Woody Allen movie Manhattan Woody and Diane Keaton are on their first date and as they walk down the street Woody tells Diane that he wants to kiss her. Puzzled she asks "right here?" He replies.."well look this is our first date and later after we eat I'll have to decide when to make the first move and this way we kiss, get it out of the way and digest our food better". Well in addition to a great line it speaks a lot of truth. How do men know when it's right to "make the first move"?

We are all brainwashed of course. We see pencil thin models on TV with great bodies and lust for them. The problem with that is that once you have spent some time naked the hard part of the relationship comes; getting to know one another and deciding if you want to spend some of your life getting to know the sweaty person panting next to you. You see we spend so much time on mind games trying to get each other into bed that somewhere we don't get to really know one another. We also spend too much time trying to please one another instead of saying what we really want. A relationship is like two overlapping circles; the part that overlaps is the part where you share each others feelings, physical enjoyment (SEX) and spend time together but the part of the circles that doesn't overlap is the you. To have a relationship you don't need to like everything your significant other does. You may like to read romance novels and he may like history books.

Then there is the sex. Unless it is hot and sweaty we believe that there is no passion. After all that's the way it is in movies. Only one problem..those people are actors ! Sex should get better as you get more comfortable with each others bodies and communicating what you like and don't like. Remember as you enter a serious relationship you will not

see another person naked and that is especially true when you get married. Some people are good in bed together others are not and frankly the sex has to be good because life is too short not to have as many orgasms as humanly possible.

I have seen some guys cheat on what I consider really beautiful woman and I don't get it. If you have someone who is that nice and beautiful with a warm heart why in this workd would you cheat? Yes even I lust for women I see but the difference between maturity and a child is knowing when to act and when to keep it zippered. In the end what goes around comes around and everything happens for the best...of course that may not be easy to see all the time but we should never stop giving because of a couple of jerks.